David Brooks, "The Confidence Questions": The Ivory Soap Dog

It was more than 30 years ago. I was pretty much working around the clock for a Wall Street law firm, I was making more money than a single guy without a mortgage knew what to do with, and the love of my life was an Alaskan Malamute named Saar. I don't know how many of you have ever owned a Malamute, but my Malamute ate everything, I mean everything: hats, gloves and any garbage he could find on the street. About the same time, Ivory Soap was running an ad campaign, asking that you send in a picture of a woman dear to you, together with an explanation of her qualifications to be an "Ivory Soap Girl," and maybe she would be featured in one of their television advertisements. Well, being who I am, I sent Ivory a picture of Saar and asked that he be featured as their "Ivory Soap Dog." I explained that Saar hates baths, but he does like to eat soap, and Ivory was his favorite brand. No, they didn't put Saar in a commercial, but they did send me a coupon which could be exchanged for a big bar of soap.

Saar ultimately passed away - regrettably, dogs do not live forever - and, being who I am, I left the Wall Street law firm, and within a year I was roaming around in "exotic" places, making good on what I thought to be ethical obligations.

In his latest New York Times op-ed entitled "The Confidence Questions" (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/04/23/opinion/brooks-the-confidence-questions.html?_r=0), David Brooks makes reference to a new Ivory Soap campaign that I have never seen (no, I suppose I should have gone to the link he provided), and then asks several questions:

• "A generation after the feminist revolution, are women still, on average, less confident than men?"

• "Are women still more likely to flow into different domains in your organization?"

• "Do we undervalue the talent for self-criticism the women display in that video?"

• "In society over all, are more problems caused by overconfidence or underconfidence?"

Regarding his last question, Brooks writes:

"The financial crisis and the tenor of our political debates suggest that overconfidence and self-idolatry are by far the larger problems. If that’s true, how do you combine the self-critical ability to recognize your limitations with the majestic confidence required to struggle against them?

I guess I’m asking how to marry self-criticism and self-assertion, a blend our society is inarticulate about. I guess I’m wondering, as we make this blend, whether most of us need more of the stereotypically female trait of self-doubt or the stereotypically male trait of self-promotion."

Brooks asks us to send him our answers, some of which he will quote in future columns. Will, I get a free bar of soap? No? In which case I will confine my short response to this blog entry.

First, thank you, David, for this distraction. At a time when the US economy is facing ruin (see: http://jgcaesarea.blogspot.co.il/2013/04/paul-krugman-jobless-trap-castigating.html), Obama is stocking his cabinet with hapless nincompoops(see: http://jgcaesarea.blogspot.co.il/2013/04/john-kerry-opines-on-turkey-is-americas.html), and America is again under attack by radical Islam (see: http://jgcaesarea.blogspot.co.il/2013/04/charles-blow-mind-of-terror-suspect.html), we are being offered the opportunity to have our names appear in your column. Hot dog! . . . not.

Regarding the confidence level of women, I'll ask my wife when she gets up. Wake her and demand an immediate reply? Sorry, but I don't think so. I survived those "exotic" locales, and I have since promised never wantonly to endanger my life again (with age, I can no longer leap buildings in a single bound).

How do I "marry self-criticism and self-assertion"? Goodness, the stakes have sometime been high in my lifetime, but without projecting confidence and letting no one know of my sleepless nights, nothing could have been achieved. Yes, I tremble before God (let's discuss the meaning of God in another blog entry), but looking back, I am grateful to have been offered the opportunity to address significant challenges, whose unsuccessful prosecution could have ruined my life, but which I believe have allowed me to contribute quietly, yet meaningfully, to society.

Arnold, my 150-pound Anatolian Shepherd? Sorry, Ivory, but unlike Saar, he doesn't consume soap.